But, where in the world are the Flat Friends?

#flathal #pitcairn #marktwain

Flat Hal and Flat Halena feel like they are in the middle of the South Pacific Ocean, seemingly a million miles from anywhere, but that can’t be true. No matter how far away “civilization” (other communities) feel like they are, surely there are other noteworthy landmasses within reach, right?

Living on such a remote island makes the food they grow and the fish they catch even more important. Supply ships come once every four months, and once those supplies are all used, it is a long wait until the next ship. What would you want the supply ship to bring?

In addition to the handicrafts, and items for sale to passengers, the islanders brought fresh vegetables, fruit and fish to the ship when we arrived. In gratitude (as a way of saying “thank you”) our ship returned the favor by giving them some food and essentials that they might need before their next supply ship arrives.

If you could bring something to Pitcairn Island to help the residents, what would it be?

Mark Twain is a great American writer from the 1800s. In addition to his famous books Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn, he wrote lots of short stories, and travel books, like “Following the Equator” about traveling to the South Pacific! The pages that follow are a team effort to capture the magic of Mark Twain along with our journey and friendship!

The Stranger That Corrupted the Perfectly Honest Third Grade

Now, if you ever wandered down the shiny hallways of a certain elementary school—I won’t say which one, to spare them the embarrassment—you would eventually come to Room 3B.

Room 3B was famous. In fact, they were the most upright, downright, straight-arrow class in the entire county. They never talked out of turn, they never cut in line at the water fountain, and above all, they never, ever told a lie. They were the “Perfectly Honest Third Grade,” and they guarded that reputation like a dragon guards a pile of shiny nickels. They even had a fancy banner over the chalkboard that read: Room 3B: Where the Truth is Always Told.

Well, sir, one Tuesday morning, a stranger walked into Room 3B. He was a tall, cheerful fellow wearing a checkered suit and a spectacular, bushy mustache. He was pulling a red wagon, and sitting in that wagon was the most glorious, gleaming treasure chest any third grader had ever laid eyes on. It was overflowing with the finest recess equipment in the world: ten perfectly bouncy kickballs, jump ropes that sparkled, high-speed yo-yos, and a golden coupon for a year of free pizza Fridays.

The class gasped. The teacher, Mr. Higgins, adjusted his glasses. “Can I help you, sir?”

“You can, Mr. Higgins,” the stranger boomed. “A few months ago, I was visiting this school to fix the boiler. I went to the cafeteria for lunch, but alas! I had lost my wallet. I was sitting there, sad and hungry, when a student from this very classroom stepped right up and bought me a tray of tater tots and a chocolate milk with their own allowance.”

The children of Room 3B looked at each other. None of them quite remembered doing this, but they were very proud that one of them had.
“I am now a very successful inventor of toys,” the stranger continued, “and I have come to repay that kind student tenfold! The entire wagon belongs to them. However, there is a catch. The student must prove it was them by telling Mr. Higgins the exact words they said to me when they handed me those tater tots.”

The stranger left the wagon, tipped his hat, and promised to return at the end of the day.

The classroom buzzed like a hive of spelling bees. Who was the hero? Every student racked their brain, but the truth was, nobody remembered saying anything to a man with a mustache.

But during recess, a strange thing happened.

Timmy, the Official Line Leader and the most perfectly behaved boy in class, found a little envelope tucked inside his desk. Inside was a note that read: Psst. I am the stranger. I am pretty sure it was you who bought me lunch. Just in case you forgot, the words you said were: “A tater tot shared is a friendship declared.”

Timmy smiled. The chest of yo-yos was practically his.

Meanwhile, across the room, Sally, the undefeated Spelling Bee Champion, found an identical envelope in her cubby. It read: Psst… I am pretty sure it was you. The words were: “A tater tot shared is a friendship declared.”

Sally grinned. The golden pizza coupon was meant for her.

In fact, the stranger had secretly slipped that exact same note to the five most “perfectly honest” students in the whole class.

When the afternoon bell rang, the stranger returned. Mr. Higgins stood by the wagon and asked, “Well, Room 3B? Who is the generous student, and what were the secret words?”

Timmy’s hand shot up like a rocket. So did Sally’s. So did three others.

“Timmy?” Mr. Higgins asked, looking confused. “Was it you?”

“Yes, Mr. Higgins,” Timmy said proudly. “And the words I said were: ‘A tater tot shared is a friendship declared.’”

“Wait!” gasped Sally, standing up. “That’s not true! I bought the lunch, and I said, ‘A tater tot shared is a friendship declared!’”

Suddenly, five students were all standing up, pointing fingers, and shouting the exact same silly sentence about tater tots! The rest of the class stared in shock. The “Perfectly Honest Third Grade” wasn’t looking so honest anymore.

The stranger chuckled, his spectacular mustache twitching. “Well, well, well,” he said. “The truth is, nobody in this room bought me lunch. I brought my own sandwich that day! I just wanted to see if the most honest class in the county was truly honest when there was a giant wagon of toys on the line.”

Timmy, Sally, and the others turned as red as a basket of tomatoes. They realized they had been tricked by their own greed. It is very easy to be honest when it costs you nothing, but the true test of honesty is telling the truth even when a golden pizza coupon is staring you right in the face.

The stranger donated the wagon to the school gym for everyone to share. As for Room 3B, they took down their fancy banner. They weren’t the “Perfectly Honest Third Grade” anymore, but they had learned a lesson worth far more than a bouncy kickball.

———

Telling the truth is hard. Write a short story about what would have happened if class 3B had been perfectly honest the day the man with the mustache came calling.

The Great
(and Somewhat Silly)
Revolution of Pitcairn

Now, let me tell you about a little speck of rock out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean called Pitcairn Island. For a long time, the folks there lived the quietest, most sensible life you could imagine. They grew their own sweet potatoes, they built their own sturdy little houses, and every morning, the children marched off to school to learn their arithmetic, their spelling, and the proper way to measure a plank of wood so a roof wouldn’t leak when the tropical rains came down.

It was a peaceful place. Perhaps a little too peaceful for a fellow named Cornelius Crumpleton.

Cornelius washed ashore one day, and he was the sort of man who possessed a very large voice and a very small amount of common sense. He looked around at the hardworking islanders and decided they were doing everything entirely wrong.

“Citizens of Pitcairn!” he announced, standing on the biggest barrel he could find. “You are working much too hard! You are suffering under the heavy burden of education! Why do children sit in school for six hours a day? It is an outrage! I say we need a Revolution!”

Well, a “revolution” sounded rather exciting to folks who usually spent their Tuesdays watching bananas ripen.

“What do you propose, Mr. Crumpleton?” asked the town mayor.

“First,” declared Cornelius, throwing his arms wide, “we shall have shorter school days! In fact, school shall now last exactly seven minutes a day. We will do away with spelling, we will banish mathematics, and we will focus entirely on Advanced Recess! As your Emperor Corny I can lead you with lots of great ideas like this!”

The children, naturally, gave a rousing cheer.

“Second!” Corny continued, puffed up like a proud rooster. “Cooking at home is a chore. We shall be a modern island! We shall establish a Department of Breakfast, a Ministry of Lunch, and a Supreme Command of Dinner!”

The grown-ups murmured in agreement. This sounded very fancy and official. Corny immediately got to work. He appointed the town blacksmith as the Grand Admiral of Breakfast. He made the baker the Chief Executive of Lunch. He gave the mayor a shiny tin medal and named him Supreme Commander of Dinner.

For a whole day, everyone felt very important. But then, Wednesday morning rolled around.

The islanders woke up, their stomachs rumbling, and marched over to the Department of Breakfast. The Grand Admiral of Breakfast was standing there, looking very official in a new hat.

“We are ready for pancakes!” the islanders cheered.

“Oh, we don’t have pancakes,” the Admiral said, scratching his chin.

“Well, how about some eggs?”

“No eggs, either,” he replied. “You see, Corny made me the head of the department, but he completely forgot to hire any chefs. I have a very nice desk, but I don’t know the first thing about scrambling an egg.”

Lunch was a similar disaster. The Chief Executive of Lunch gave a very nice speech about the importance of sandwiches, but there wasn’t a crumb of bread to be found. By the time the Supreme Commander of Dinner announced that dinner was canceled due to a lack of cooks, the islanders were getting rather cranky.

But the real trouble started on Thursday when a big, gray storm cloud rolled in over the ocean. The wind howled, the rain poured, and the roof of the town hall sprang a terrible leak. Water dripped right onto Cornelius Crumpleton’s nose.

“Quick!” Corny shouted to the youngsters.
“Fetch some wood and nails! Patch that hole!”

The children grabbed some planks and scrambled up the ladder, but then they simply sat there on the roof, getting soaked.

“What are you waiting for?” Corny yelled over the thunder.

“Well, Mr. Crumpleton,” one of the older girls called down, “to fix a roof, you have to measure the hole and cut the wood to the exact fraction. But since you cut school down to seven minutes, we haven’t learned fractions! We don’t even know how to spell ‘hammer’ anymore, let alone swing one! We’d ask our teacher, but you fired them when you shortened the school day!”

The islanders stood in the puddles, hungry and wet, and realized they had been sold a very silly bill of goods. A fancy title doesn’t bake a potato, and skipping school doesn’t keep the rain out.

The very next morning, the good people of Pitcairn politely lifted Cornelius Crumpleton by his suspenders, placed him in a rowboat, and suggested he go find another island to “revolutionize.”

Then, they all went home, cooked a massive, sensible breakfast together — like the team their community had always been, and the children marched happily back to the schoolhouse—where they stayed for a full six hours, quite eager to learn exactly how fractions keep your head dry.

The Leader
Who Lost
Their Way

We saw firsthand on Pitcairn Island what happens when someone like “Emperor Corny” takes charge but completely forgets how to be a good leader. Instead of listening and helping, he just made a mess!

Now it is your turn to write a story about a team that has to save the day when their leader forgets how to lead.

Your Story Mission: Imagine you and your best friends are put in charge of a very important project. Maybe you are sailing a ship across the ocean, building the world’s most epic treehouse, or running a bakery that makes giant cookies. The only problem is, your team’s leader has forgotten what it means to be a good boss!

To get your story started, answer these three questions:
What is your team’s big mission? (Are you exploring a jungle? Organizing a huge parade?)
What silly or unhelpful things does the leader start doing? (Do they hide the map? Do they make a rule that everyone has to work while hopping on one foot?)
How does your team work together to save the day? (How do you kindly teach the leader the right way to work as a team?)

Write your story, and share it with your friends! Remember, the best teams always find a way to work together.

A Tale of Two Bossy Leaders: Fact vs. Fiction

Did you know that the made-up story of Emperor Corny and the true history of Pitcairn Island have a very funny thing in common? They both feature a leader who forgot how to be a good teammate—and both of them ended up in a rowboat!

Here is how our silly fictional Emperor compares to the very real Captain of the HMS Bounty:

The Real History: Captain William Bligh
Who he was: The real-life captain of the British sailing ship, the HMS Bounty.

How he lost his way: Captain Bligh was incredibly strict and often yelled at his tired sailors. He refused to listen to his crew or treat them with kindness.

The “Mutiny”: A mutiny is when a crew decides they will no longer follow their captain. Bligh’s sailors finally got so fed up with his bossing that they took over the ship! They forced Captain Bligh into a small rowboat in the middle of the ocean, and then sailed away to hide on Pitcairn Island.

The Tall Tale: Emperor Corny
Who he was: The made-up, bossy stranger from our Mark Twain-style story.

How he lost his way: Corny wasn’t mean like Captain Bligh, but he was incredibly silly! He made ridiculous rules, like seven-minute school days and a Department of Breakfast with absolutely no chefs.

The “Mutiny”: Just like Bligh’s sailors, the people of Pitcairn realized Corny was a terrible leader. When the roof leaked and no one knew how to fix it, the islanders worked together to politely pick him up, put him in a rowboat, and send him away!

The Big Lesson: Whether in real history or in a funny story, a good leader listens to their team and helps them succeed. If a leader only gives bossy orders and makes terrible rules, they just might find themselves sent away in a tiny rowboat!

Silly Rules and Tough Truths: Comparing Two Stories

Mark Twain lived over 150 years ago, but his writing remains popular with people today! We didn’t read “The Great Revolution in Pitcairn” (written in 1879), or “The Man That Corrupted Hadleyburg” (written 20 years later in 1899). Instead the adults the Flat Friends are traveling with found a way to share the heart (core) and lessons of those stories with us in a way we could relate to. We got the humor without the politics!

The Tricky Stranger

In both of these stories, a peaceful, happy group of people gets turned upside down when a newcomer arrives!
Pitcairn Island: The island is a quiet place where people work hard, grow sweet potatoes, and go to school to learn arithmetic. Suddenly, a loud man named Cornelius Crumpleton arrives. He tricks the islanders into making him their leader, and distracts them from survival!

Room 3B: This class is famous for being the “Perfectly Honest Third Grade”. One day, a stranger with a bushy mustache walks in. He brings a shiny wagon full of toys and tricks the kids by asking who bought him lunch.
What Are We Laughing At? (The Lesson)
Mark Twain loved to poke fun at the silly things people do. While both stories start the same way, they teach us very different lessons.
Silly Rules (Pitcairn): This story makes fun of foolish leaders and bad ideas. Cornelius sets up a fancy-sounding “Department of Breakfast” but completely forgets to hire any chefs to cook the food! It shows us that having a fancy title doesn’t mean you actually know how to do a good job.

Testing Honesty (Room 3B): This story is about a harder lesson. The kids in Room 3B brag about always telling the truth. However, when the stranger offers a golden pizza coupon, five kids tell the exact same lie about sharing tater tots. It reminds us that it is very easy to be honest when it costs you nothing, but much harder when there is a big prize on the line.

How Does It End?
The two stories have very different endings. One is a funny fix (a rowboat), and the other is a tough lesson (taking down the banner the kids are so proud of).